Didja Know: Hair Is A Critical Factor In History

Today’s most bombastic headlines feature two world leaders threatening each other with hair-raising destruction. One wears an orange toupee with flowing locks on top and down the back collar. The other has the sides of his head shaved, making him look like a tubby jailbird.

Those two are just the latest to make hairy history. There have been many others. Strong guy Sampson, an early hirsute, could win any battle until Delilah gave him a haircut. Rapunzel was locked in that tall tower until she let down her hair for the climbing prince.

Lady Godiva rode through Coventry naked, covered only by her long hair. One sneaky look by Peeping Tom caused him to go blind. During World War 2, Germany’s Hitler sported his Charlie Chaplin moustache and loose lock of hair, while Russia’s Stalin glowered with his hairy handlebar.

Today, we see rap stars featuring all kinds of kinky hair in many colors, shapes and flows. Meanwhile, grossly overpaid pro football jocks squat during the National Anthem while their enormous hair-dos rise in patriotic respect for their bank accounts.

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