What If History Were To Be Relationship Corrected…

These days it seems just about every physical contact between men and women leads to sensational news and enriched lawyers. Therefore, let’s go back poetically to historically famous couples who could have had different relationships in today’s sanitized, inter-sexual behavior:
To Adam from Eve: Get your dirty hands off my cleave.
Cleopatra to Caesar: Marc Anthony is a better pleaser.
Juliet to Romeo: Get thee away from me, thou homeo!
Ann Boleyn to Henry the King: Because of you my head went zing!
Josephine to Nappy: Go to Waterloo if it’ll make you happy.
Victoria to Albert: Restrain those princely hands, you pervert!
Scarlett to Rhett: Frankly, my dear, I wouldn’t have you on a bett!
Bonnie to Clyde: Is it safe to go on that one last car ride?
Hillary to Billy: I’d be President if you hadn’t behaved so silly!
To Donald from Melania: When you grope other women, I go insania!

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