Science Says Humans May Soon Become Immortal

We’re already immoral, but with advancing tech we homo sapiens may live virtually forever. According to the mad scientists making that wild claim, even after our physical bodies waste away, we’ll be able to technically preserve our minds and consciousness indefinitely in mechanical imitations of humans.

Sounds good, but consider the drawbacks. Imagine an immortal Donald Trump still building walls, phony colleges and hotels. Think of Kardashians ever increasing their clan with mindless gab, lousy music and breeding more kids with idiotic names.

And we immortals would be forced to watch endless TV commercials offering miracle drugs and advice to help 500-year-old women make connections and 600-year-old men make erections. And, of course, centuries-old Tom Brady would continue to quarterback the Patriots, and eons-elderly Justice Ginsberg perched on her Supreme Court seat forever.

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